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WeSnCaRmEn
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Name: Clifton W.
Location: Tupelo, Mississippi, United States
Birthday: 12/14/1979
Gender: Male
Interests: Fourwheeler riding, XBOX, PS2, Wii, Gaming of any type, watching movies, listening to great music of any type almost, reading horror/scifi books, and just enjoying life to the fullest
Occupation: Nurse's Assistant
Industry: Medical / Health Care
Message: message me
ICQ:  290529722
Yahoo:  wes2carmen
Member Since:
11/4/2003
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| Well, Xanga, yep, I'm back. I know, I hate to sound like one of those people, but I can't help it. I tried MySpace for awhile, and it just sorta died out. I'm still on Facebook, but it has gotten to be the place where too many people are on there (if you know what I mean). Xanga is more like a community where there can be many people on it, but you can also have your small group of people if you choose. We have a new addition to our family on the way this Thanksgiving. A baby girl named Avery Reese Cartwright. Plus, as of August 1st I started working with my dad in his clinic full time. Mon-Wed 8:30a-5:30p and Thurs-Fri 8':30a-12:30p plus it is salary making close to what I did at the hospital (plus no nightshift). This is ideal so that I will actually get to be there and spend time with my daughter. This should be the happiest time of my life. Why then, am I about as depressed as I have been in awhile? Well, that's brings me to the third part of this equation.. I'm also going back to school to get my BSN and hopefully continue on through MSN and FNP. This semester I'm taking Nutrition and Chemistry. Which some people may remember high school chemistry and realize part of the reason why this class torments me. I have almost no experience to draw on in chemistry, and it didn't help this semester dealing with Northeast screwing up so much with my admission that borders on absurdity (yeah, couldn't think of a harsh enough word but thesaurus.com helped;). At the beginning things seemed in order and going smoothly. An employee of Northeast was helping me find exactly which classes would transfer to UNA to finish my BSN without difficulty, another employee helped me with the login code and getting my schedule set up and again, everything was going smoothly. A week later, I get a call from a third employee (gotta admit, she was very helpful) that noticed something didn't look right with my schedule. We figured out that they had me in under another person. I had been scheduling classes for him and had access to his information because the 2nd employee I talked to didn't take the time to match up such things as a social security #. Well, that's not the end, then I find out my email accounts were screwed up and I'm getting email to a new account they made for me that I don't have access to and not the original account that they figured out I was supposed to be using all along. Okay, well, that all got fixed. The problems are over.. right? Nope.... The day class starts, 8/22, I login to find the chemistry class I'm in is not the one I was supposed to be in and that I bought all the materials for.. $400 in materials to be exact. I'm put in another online chemistry class.. at ANOTHER COLLEGE. I'm in some online chemistry class through Northwest.... Okay, so I called to get this looked at and I found out the class at Northeast didn't make since there weren't enough people to take it, and it seems actually like they tried to help me out by at least finding me another one to take. This didn't really help my feelings any and did cause me to loose $400 down the drain that I don't really have extra to begin with. This seems like enough drama and like it is over right, but it's not. The best is yet to come, but I've gotta go to work so will continue later.... | | |
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| I know I haven't written on xanga in awhile. I had almost given up on it, but I've had a revelation tonight about what I can write about when I do get a need to write something. Why not write about nightmares.... I feel like I have to write something down about them when I wake up but have never really done anything about it. So, without further stalling, you, my xanga friends, get to be privy to my nightmares. Just be wary, I've got one sick and twisted mind to be digging in....
Waking up.... (June 8th, 2009 2:40am)
The dream wasn't that bad this time. It was that recurring dream that I feel like I've had many times before. I'm in this story, almost like a live book narrative. The narrator is the voice of the medium from the Poltergeist movies that does the Scariest Places on Earth narratives. She's talking about the story of a little girl about 9 or 10 that lives in a small town. Her family is not the best in the world but they get along. She does have one friend. The small town policeman. She can tell all her troubles to him and he is like a big brother to her. The family is going on a trip and end up in the town of Paewoeton. Paewoeton is a small town unlike her own, but it is very old, filled with history. There are stone columns lining the town surrounded by green, lush meadows and the ocean on one side. There is a flood that destroys most of the town and she is stuck in one of the larger buildings of the town with her family. Over time the other members of her family die of illness and malnutrition but she is strong, she lives on. Even when the cries and pulls of her dead loved ones threaten to pull her down into the murky depths of the cesspool that has engulfed the building she is in, she lives on... She hears voices... Not the voices, the whispers she has been hearing for days. No, these are the real, live voices of people, real, live people come to save her. They are banging on doors of the building to try to find people. They are banging on her door. She bangs back. Strong hands pull her out of the water and into the light. It is the policeman from her hometown. He saves her.... I wake up....
I'm lying in my bed, on my stomach with my head to the right side with the sheet down draped over my shoulders. Everything feels normal and comfortable. I'm thinking how that wasn't such a bad dream and trying to remember the details, slowly fading away. I feel someone crawling into the bed beside me, lifting the sheets and pressure on the mattress. My wife usually stays up late since she works nights and usually comes to bed really late some times. Except... she's at work... I can feel (as I'm writing this, there are shivers running all over me)... I can feel them moving closer to me in the bed, up to the point of breathing in my left ear a cold, cold breath. I can't scream! I can't even talk.... I finally get the courage to try to move and thrash in the bed back and forth with every bit of strength only managing to put out a few gurgles yelps of fright. Then.... I wake up.
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| Let's see... a lot has happened since I last posted. I've mainly been working very hard and studying my butt off for Nursing school. I actually did pass 3rd semester Nursing but lost a few really good friends in the process. The teachers told us when we started Nursing school that life would go on with or without us and things would happen while we were in school, good and bad. This has been a very rough semester. I started out without a close friend of mine, Jennifer P., that didn't make it last semester and made a new friend that had challenged in from the LPN program, Brandi.
In Nursing school, you have to have close friends to lean on that actually understand what you are going through and you do tend to get very close to these people. They are your best friends, your sisters and brothers in this challenging field that takes no prisoners and a rigorous torture routine. Brandi, Jennifer H., and Lauren had become my new best friends this semester. I still had some of the same friends I've had since the beginning, but you can't help but have just a few people that you can tell just about anything to and that was especially these three.
I did not have long to get to know Brandi but knew right away she was a very special person. The Saturday before our 3rd test, we lost this very special person to an accident near her home... you cry, you mourn, you move on. One of our other friends, Anita, had her house burn down the weekend before the 4th test... you hurt, you're angry, you move on. I've had my own personal problems and losses this semester that I'd still rather not mention on here yet, but I moved on. Before the end of the semester one of my other really good friends, that I would have not made it through Microbiology without, Jenna, had to withdraw because of her grades, we miss her, we move on. And at the end of the semester, two of my other good friends, best friends... Jennifer and Lauren, did not make it after the final exam.
I've got to go on to 4th semester and graduate (hopefully) without them. Don't get me wrong, I'm proud I made it, but I'd be much happier to get to share the joy with these as well as other very special people that deserve to be there as much or more than I do.
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| Well, I'm starting my second year of Nursing school next Thursday, August 14th. In a way, I'm excited and a little scared all at the same time. I hope everything goes well and that I can keep ahead on assignments and studying. I've always had a problem of being a procrastinator. Hopefully I can break that this semester. I'm gonna try to go ahead and start reading some of the assignments for the first week or two in a hope that I can get ahead and stay ahead. If I can get myself to go ahead and read some every day or two then maybe I can stick with that routine. Either way, I've got to study like I never have before and try to get off on the right foot this time. Wish me luck, I'll need it. We all will....
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